Over 8 years ago, Laura Parsons Lytle said goodbye to "dating", and started praying for her future husband, instead. God had made her heart brand new, and whole. And He started to show her that it's a thing of value to share with the man that He created just for her. So instead of going on meaningless dates, and giving piece after piece of herself to guys that have no clue how to treat a daughter of the King, she wrote a list of the Godly qualities that her husband will have. And instead of spending time with guys that she has no intention of marrying, she spends time at the feet of Jesus, praying for the man that she will eventually share her life with. She writes him letters, prays for him, and periodically posts little messages to him. And through her ministry, she educates single ladies on how God sees them; as His beautiful, valuable daughters. She stresses the importance of allowing God to lock up their hearts, until the right man, the one who has asked God for the "Keys" to their hearts, pursues them.

Below you can read blogs Laura has written on the subject, and even a couple letters to her Future Husband. Follow her @LauraPLytle to read her periodic #DearFutureHusband posts. 

Keep watch for Laura's new book and accompanying devotional "True Love Prays" coming soon!!!


My favorite quote: "I am not looking for the love of my life, He already found me. I am waiting for the one that I will serve the Love of My Life beside."

-Kara Richardson

  I've often told single girls that I mentor just to dance with Jesus, and He will let the right man join in. It sounds simple enough, but the truth is that most people don't really know what it means to "dance with Jesus". So much emphasis in our culture is put on "finding the perfect man" when the reality is that the only perfect Man has already found you! Time and time again, I've watched girls give their hearts to guys that had no idea what to do with them.  ( I even used to be one of those girls!) Not all of the guys were bad, some of them even loved God, and attend and serve at church every week. But the reality is, that isn't enough.

When I say that I've been "dancing" with Jesus for nearly 9 years, it's not as metaphorical as it sounds. Take for instance the other day, when I had a lunch date with Jesus. I went to the park, sat at a table, put on some intimate worship music, and was so aware of the overwhelming presence of my Jesus, that as I gazed across the table, I could almost see His eyes gazing back at me from the other side. And at times when I'm walking down the street, it's as if I can feel His hand in mine, gently leading me along.

I’ll admit that when I decided to do this whole "dancing with Jesus and allowing Him to let the right man join in" thing, I didn't really know what it entailed, either. My ex-husband had betrayed me, and my life was far from the perfect-white picket fence-dream that I'd envisioned as a child. I just knew that this man, this Jesus, came to me one night in the filth and shame that was my former life, and though my sins were scarlet, He made me white as snow. Though I was lost, broken, and rejected, He found me, made me whole, and called me His own. God's word said that He is my Husband and He chose me. He loved me exactly as He found me. And from that moment on I knew one thing for sure, that I am unconditionally loved by the Creator of all things...and if I were ever to marry another human being, God and God alone would set the standard of who that man would be.

Before Jesus, I was used to being tossed aside by everyone I ever cared about. I was used to being rejected, and abandoned. I was used to being let down,

never chosen, always overlooked. But then Jesus started to lead me in this dance, a dance where He showed me what I'm worth, and what I deserve. And I began to believe Him. Still I was constantly surrounded by Christian girls who would give their hearts away for free. And I’d still watch guys, even ones who love Jesus, go after these girls because it's "easier" than winning a heart that is actually a prize. I’ve often been told that my standards are too high, or that I should just give this guy or that guy a chance. But I know how Jesus treats me, and if a guy isn’t at least trying to hit that mark (I’m not naive enough to think that any human being was going to hit it every single time, no matter how great their heart may be.) then the most they will get from me is casual friendship at best. A man who truly sees your value, will pay the price to have you. Don’t be swayed by everything that you see around you, I wasn’t. The only swaying that I do nowadays is back and forth with Jesus on the dance floor.

No matter how Godly or amazing a man is, he is just that, a man. A man who is not perfect. A man who can fall just like any other man. So it ultimately isn’t about a person being "good enough". None of us are good enough, if not for Jesus. But who should I be with that will bring the most glory to God? Who should I be with that has given himself, all of himself, to Jesus, just like I have. It's about knowing my own worth, and you knowing yours. Some of the most amazing, Godly guys, still have no clue how to treat one of God's daughters. Many people look at me and think that they are for me, they ask me out, they call me, they might even know the right things to say. But most of them wouldn't know what to do with me if they had me. It takes a strong man to lead a strong woman. A man who isn’t willing to compromise. A man who is willing to take up his own cross every single day, no matter what it costs him. A man whose heart is truly after Jesus.

When you think of the man who you want to be with, do you ask yourself these questions; Will he treat me as I deserve to be treated? Will he respect me and protect my heart and my purity? Will he take the time to make me feel special and appreciated? Will he go to my Father and ask for the keys to my heart? Will he love me the way that Christ loves the church? Will he pray for me? You deserve for a man to treat you like the queen that you are, bring you flowers, open doors for you, treat you with respect...but also pray for you, protect you, and support you in the calling that God has on your life... and so do I. But as important as all of the things I just mentioned are, I want to be clear about something...the emphasis is not on the man that I'm waiting for, it rests solely on the One with whom I'm already dancing...and fully becoming the woman that He created me to be.
Ladies, Jesus DIED for you. He was beaten, and bruised, and rejected, and made fun of, and He took all of it because He loves you so much. He ransomed you, He rose again so that you could be loved, so you could be free. He paid far too great of a price for you to let a man devalue you! The least that a man should do is respect you, value you, appreciate you, and love you. But he can’t complete you. A man will never be able to complete me, and I don't need him too. Jesus already did that. If you haven’t allowed Him to complete you, then you’re not even ready to be with a man. Your hope shouldn’t be in a man, it has to be in Jesus.  Never put your hope in something that can be taken away. But trust God, that He has the very best future in store for you, and that He will only give the keys to your heart to the man who asks for them. If a man can't do that, then he doesn't even deserve you, no matter who he is. You are a thing of immeasurable value, and you deserve to be treated as such.

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Dear Future Husband,        

Truly learning to love you has been an ongoing process. I didn’t just wake up one day, and know how. Every day, I love you more, and that will continue all the way into eternity. But I’m not learning from people, I’m learning from the Father. And before I could learn to love you, I had to learn to love myself. To know my worth, and not allow people to devalue me. Before I truly learned I let people treat me as worthless, because that’s what I thought I was. 

       Many people think they know what love is, but the truth is, most don't  understanding it fully. I’ve seen many things, and been treated many ways…all in the name of love. And before I knew what love actually was…I believed them. I’ve been stalked, obsessed about, and “locked in boxes”, but love does not demand it’s own way. I’ve been degraded and ignored, but loves sees and uplifts. I’ve been rejected and abandoned…but love never fails, and it always accepts. I’ve had lust and perversion chase after me…and been watched and admired from afar…but love don’t chase, it pursues…and it doesn’t just watch, LOVE DOES.

       By the time Jesus found me, I didn’t even know how to receive true love, because I had never actually experienced it. But, once He started to teach me, I chose to stay single and wait for you...because I know that I’m worth it, and so are you! Others have tried to get me…repeating the above things over and over and over…but none of those things are love…so none of them stood a chance.

      True love is what I’m waiting for. Nothing else is worth it. It’s not based out of fear…true love casts it out. It doesn’t demand it’s own way…that wouldn’t be love. It doesn’t hide it’s feelings, or back away…love is bold, and it rejoices in the truth. It’s not twisted or timid…because through God love has power, and a sound mind. That’s how I know that you aren’t a coward who will try to tame me, shame me, or refuse to claim me…but a king who will be proud to have me, encourage and lead me. You’re not someone to take my purity, but someone to protect it. You’re not someone who will break my heart and leave…but someone who will guard my heart, stay committed, and protect my honor. You won’t make me compete for your love, because once you see that I’m yours, there won’t be any competition. I know this about you…even though I don't know who you are. How? Because, when I pray for you, I see your heart through the eyes of Love. 

         Pursuing me, may be the very thing that scares you the most. What if I say no? What if it’s too soon? What if I reject you? I can assure you that many people have asked themselves those very same questions. But for you, faith will shine through with a question that will overpower them all…WHAT IF IT DOES WORK OUT??? Love is a risk. But you’ll come after me, because it’s worth it. It will take faith! Just like it takes faith for me to write these crazy letters, like messages in a bottle thrown into the sea. But you know that faith really does move mountains. And that’s what will set you apart…that’s why you are different. Because you don’t just desire me…you value me. Because even though you might be afraid at times…you’re courageous. And even though it’s a risk…it’s not worth it to settle for anything else. That’s why I’m waiting for you…my once in a lifetime. There is only you. ❤️L 


Nothing that I can write, is going to make you fall in love with me. I can't perform for your approval, and I won't try to win your love. Love is a choice, and I made my choice a long time ago. I chose to wait for you. I'm not searching to the ends of the Earth for you, though; there is no need. I searched all through the night for Jesus, and He already made me whole. I don't need you to complete me, I don't want you to worship me, and my validation doesn't come from you. I just need you to lead me, serve with me, love me, and worship with me. This isn't an attempt to sway, rush, or move you...even my voice should not come before your Father's. When it’s time, He will show you what to do. I can't unlock my own heart, I gave the keys to God long ago, so you have to go to Him to get in. You've already started seeking Him, and His will for your life. Some day, those prayers, and the ones that I say for you, will lead you right to me. Praying for you, Babe. You are so loved. ❤L